Mr May 2011

If you're going to do a combover, Rick, you need to start combing from further down.



Placing the parting one inch above the ear is recommended in extreme cases such as this.

Mr April 2011

Lovely background. We advise arranging your icons around his head, like a halo around an image of the Virgin Mary.



And put your Recycle Bin where his lapel badge is.

Pieter Nota, Chief Executive Officer, Consumer Lifestyle, Philips

Leslie Phillips 2.0.



The above reference won't work for international readers.

Mr March, 2011

Due to overwhelming issues to do with these men having nothing better to do than Google themselves and complain about it, the new policy going forwards is to not refer to them by name in the body text.

We shall instead refer to them by SUPER SECRET CODE NAMES only known to us. This is Mr Nathan Horn-Rimmington.



This should mean that it'll soon be possible to access the email account without receiving daily threats of legal action. And you'd think a man who works for a dentist would take this opportunity to exhibit his teeth.

APPEAL: High-resolution image of James J. Sutliff required

Has been known to operate small-to-medium-sized retail businesses under the pseudonym "Jim".



Start the hunt here, and DO NOT REST until you've found one of him and his wife holidaying in Hawaii. Thanks to reader Richard for picking up the initial scent.

K.C. Mathews, Executive Vice President and Chief Investment Officer, UMB Bank

We had planned to manufacture a physical calendar again this year, but sort of forgot. And felt guilty about not updating the site enough to ask for MONEY in exchange for merchandise.

So here's an awkward compromise.



At least this is free. We suggest putting your icons on the grey area.

Kevin Cooney, Corporate Vice President & Chief Information Officer, Xilinx

False teeth?



Eyes look suspicious as well. And no way are those actual ears.

Mark Keatley, Executive Vice President of Finance & IT, Actavis

This image was tagged "AUG2010" so Mark should still look pretty much the same in real life. Maybe a bit less tanned and with a bushier moustache, perhaps even in different glasses, but within this visual ballpark.



Submitted by "Roy". Thanks. You have a nice eye for it, Roy. We should meet up and hang out inside Canary Wharf one lunchtime with a spotters checklist.

READER SUBMISSION: B. Kevin Turner, Chief Operating Officer, Microsoft

This one messes with your perception of the male form. You expect there to be no hair, than all of a sudden there's LOADS OF HAIR, then it goes back to expecting there's no hair again all the way down.

Definitely no more hair on Mr Turner between lip and toes. It's all chemically and mechanically removed once a month. Bet he even puts his trimmings in the bin, rather than wedging them down the plug hole, too.



"The lack of tie is excused - this is the casual option from Microsoft's
selection of B. Kevin Turner images. Wonder if his office nickname is 'B' or 'Kev'?" - Alex.

Thomas F. Lagatta, Executive Vice President, Worldwide Sales, Broadcom

We went to the Broadcom press site for WORK PURPOSES and, as usual, couldn't help but hopefully browse to the Executive Photo Library in case there was anything useful up there of a sufficient resolution for misappropriating on this secondary hobbyist niche blog.

And there was.



Glad we checked. Nearly didn't, as the home internet's a bit slow at the moment. It was fate, Tom. Fate brought us together.

Varel Freeman, First Vice President, European Bank

Suit matched to hair. Literal interpretation of the white collar worker. Great moustache. Glasses. Bad tie. Skin that was last exposed to sunlight on the Sunday afternoon prior to starting the job in April of 1991.



And if we're not very much mistaken...



...a sneaky bowl of his daughter's Coco Pops for breakfast.

APPEAL: High-resolution image of Hadi Jaroudi required

We have many questions about this image, primarily to do with how he gets it so smooth and pointed and why, after going to so much effort with the top of his head, he would then let the bottom of it go completely to seed.



Hadi works for Future Pipe Industries, which we would also [X] Like to know more about. Someone emailed this in ages ago. Thanks, whoever you are/were. It's been a while.

Henk van Houten, Senior Vice President & General Manager, Philips Research

Couldn't pass up the opportunity to feature a man called Henk.



Henk is currently heading up research into sudden and unusual ear growth spurts in men over the age of 50.

Ferdinando "Nani" Beccalli-Falco, President and CEO, International, GE

"Nani" is what people call him during their final few minutes in the woods behind the storage depot.



"On my desk by 10.30am MEANS on my desk by 10:30am, not a lame email at 10.35am saying it's nearly finished and you've just got to spell-check it and print it out."

Mark Walker, President, Walker and Associates, Inc.

Too obvious. The blue in the tie to bring out the blue eyes. The blue in the background to bring out the blue eyes. They're telegraphing it, Brian.



As if we need reminding that ginger people tend to have blue eyes.

Christopher Welp, Executive Vice President of Insurance Operations, Aviva USA

They churn these ones out in China at a rate of 10,000 per day. They come over in boxes a bit like coffins, then you buy one at the supermarket when you have some admin you need doing.



Sorry, Chris, you're a disposable item. Use once to fill in a boring form, then deflate and incinerate.

Graeme Bottger, Vice President and Controller, Alcoa

You'd look this confident, too, if your official job title called you the "Controller".

Only the Controller can get away with having a moustache.



FAVOURED METHOD OF CONTROL: Balls in a vice.

Ray O'Connor, President and CEO, Topcon Positioning Systems

That lapel badge symbolises his favourite breakfast cereal, for meeting small-talk purposes.



Shredded Wheat. That why his skin's so healthy.

Marc R. Viscogliosi, Principal, Viscogliosi Bros. LLC

There's not much more you can do with hair like that, except have it swept as far out of sight as possible. He'd look even crazier with a fringe.



Here he is with a makeshift fringe:



We started doing another version with it all shaved off, but it was too graphic. We frightened ourselves.

John Harju, Associate Director for Research, EERC

Some rudimentary post production has been attempted here. Backgrounds that uniform simply do not exist in nature.



Unless he's in a meeting room in THE VORTEX.