Thursday, 8 October 2009

Delbert Humenik, senior vice president of sales and marketing, Paychex

Always purchases the type of shampoo designed for "flyaway" hair. We have emailed his HR department to enquire about what brand of toothpaste Delbert recommends. Will let you know.

Beautiful. Put some lipstick on him and we probably would, out of boredom, late on a Friday afternoon, just for something to do and to see what it's like. His body is going to be 100% hairless, isn't it?


GigerPunk said...

Hey guys! You could have a smile like Tommy Steele's too, if you used Crelm toothpate just like I do!
A-bop wop a-doo-wop a-bop good-bye!

Carr said...

You need a prescription for the kind of toothpaste he uses and a special brush. One tube a year is the maximum any dentist will allow, otherwise they wear away to nothing.

Sponge Finge said...

Those aren't his real teeth. They are a set of six in a row which you buy and just place over your top front teeth for photographs. I have two of these.

Anonymous said...

Hey cuz,

do you really think you're sexy?


Rock City said...

photo touch up on the teeth. Also a little black eyeliner touch up on the eyelid. The magic of Photoshop. Hey all and all, this is a good photo.

And now, by special request is a poem.

How can an exex smile such sweet smiles,
When one is so saddened by sorrows for miles,
How can an exec smile the same smiles,
When life brings nothing but tears,

I wondered for so long,
What reason Delbert had to smile that long,
To keep smiling with those snow white teeth,
Though troubles come,
And still remain sweet and silently overcome,

It's such a mystery you see,
Your smiles from heaven with glee,
Your employees adore and yet envy thee,
But every girls says I'd rather you smile those at me,

I feel happy when I see you smile,
Even if I'm sad and lonely,
Your smiles bring me somewhere,
I don't even know where,

But it was you the exec,
Your executive glow gave me the reason to smile,
To smile with no reason,
To smile for a smile,

I guess life is just like that,
We need not a reason to smile,
For a smile is the reason itself,
To rejoice and open-heartedly give thanks,

We can all learn to smile because of you,
Because your executive smiles bring me joy when blue,
It proves how well and powerful,
A simple sweet smile can become so beautiful,

Smile for the sake of a smile,
Smile for the sake of happiness,
Smile for the sake of life,
Smile because of hope left in life,

Smile my friends,
Smile for me my Love,
Smile those same sweet smiles,
Smile so the world can be a peaceful dove...

Trilby said...

More bodily fluids in the next poem please.

Anonymous said...

He doesn't even look like this in person LOL. I know because I've seen him. Very nice guy, very laid back, and runs from suits. Someone from corporate must've dressed him for this photoshoot and he probably had jeans on the bottom half. Also his teeth are not that white, must be photoshop.

Anonymous said...

what a dick

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Fraud incompetent asshole....Google hypermedia and del humenik
And see what they have to say

Clark said...

Interesting comments from readership. Right on target.

That's why I like this website. It allows us to parady and find the real truth behind these "masked men". Ha ha.

Keep up the good work, and don't let their lawyers try and scare you.

This website provides balance to these "execs" attempt to persuade you with their photos that they are something special.

Anonymous said...

Del Humenik, last but not least, ask anyone from Paychecks about this dude, simply put, what is he doing here? I will tell you, he is the enforcer, the hatchet man. He is not here for his business sense but to cut us to the bone. Dumb, dumb, and dumber. Why do we all hate this place? I just laid it out for you, incompetent, arrogant, out dated, executives who, if they ever had an original thought, the next one would be their first one.

Charlie said...

Is it my perception right? His earlobes look unusually big and his ear hole kinda small.

Photoshope artwork?

Do you have to have big earlobes to be an exec? Is that why it's so hard to become an exec and make the big money?

I have small earlobes. Too bad for me.

Anonymous said...'t not about the ear-hole!

Anonymous said...

delbert looks 200 years older in person, and so does his wife mimi.

DeeDoubleYou3 said...


DeeDoubleYou3 said...

Well we think he's a f_____ing c__t.

Anonymous said...

Aren't his parents dwarves?

Anonymous said...

And Alicia sleeps with that??? Ew.

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Anonymous said...

Typical douche narcissist.

Anonymous said...

I saw them on Say Yes To The Dress and he looks nothing like this photo shopped picture. He's pretty rough looking. I saw her FB page. It looks like all they do is travel and brag about it on FB!

Anonymous said...

He's FAR from sexy. It must be the money.

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