Monday, 29 June 2009

Garth Saloner, next Dean of Stanford Graduate School of Business

Here's a man who hasn't updated his collection of suits since he got his first low-level executive position in 1972. He also wore this to his wedding in 1978. And to funerals in 1982, 1987, 1988, 1992 and 1996. The suit was then 'mothballed' in 1997 in favour of a more casual, jacket-less style - but Garth's recent promotion demanded a quick dry clean and a return to service.

If suits could talk, the tales this one could tell!


Come on, Garth. There are some superb deals to be had on the high street at the moment. Single breasted suits aren't just for unruly young rock bands like The Beatles and the Rolling Stones. No one's going to think you're smuggling marijuana through customs just because you're wearing a modern fabric cut in a vaguely flattering manner.

10 comments:

Trilby said...

I would think his nose safely deflects any attention from his tailoring. And anything else except his nose.

Probability of Garth knowing how to use Google: 7%

AK said...

That man is the wrong shape.

Anonymous said...

He's a cross between Bill Gates and Rodney Dangerfield!

Sean said...

I just want to know where they transplanted the two inches of jaw he's missing.

I desperately want to pull the photo tight, to reveal the fold running along beneath his ears and across his lips that someone comically decided to include before scanning.

GARTH YOUR HEAD STOPS TOO SOON.

Anonymous said...

You are all assholes. I bet your mothers are proud that they produced such pathetic individuals.

GigerPunk said...

Blimey. Seem to be more and more 'Anonymous' types appearing lately to proclaim we're all a bunch of [insert run-of-the-mill US-centric boring insult that reveals a complete lack of any form of imagination whatsoever].
(If imagination is really in short supply, simply choose one from this handy list: Airhead, Ass, Ass-hat, Asshole, Asswipe, Choad, Cockbite, Cockknocker, Dickwad, Dillweed, Doofus, Dork, Douche, Douchebag, oh I'm bored and I've not even got to F yet)

Where are they all coming from and how much longer are we going to have to put up with this kind of treatment?
They think they can just 'logon' to the internet, safe in the knowledge we've no idea who they are, come to a website they've no interest in contributing anything meaningful to and then procede to slag us all off; then 'logoff' again to go back to their sad, grey, empty and meaningless lives giggling like silly immature childr...ow
I think I've hurt my irony gland.
That IS what that stabbing feeling in my groin would be, yes?

The CEO said...

The executives have become self-aware and are Googling themselves. You can see a pattern - name pops up in search term referral results, then mysterious anonymous comment appears four minutes later.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry that you were all too moronic to be accepted to the Stanford GSB that Dean Saloner now runs. Perhaps if you spent your time doing something more worthwhile than posting offensive comments here, you might be able to make something of yourselves.

GigerPunk said...

Blast. If only I spent more time studying I could be anonymously leaving nasty comments online instead of, errr, hold on there's that feeling again...

Anonymous said...

I had Garth as a teacher in the 90s. He played favorites and in general picked the wrong horses. After playing favorites - he then has the nerve to ask the same people he devalued for money.

Arrogant Jerk.

Post a Comment

Post a Comment