Whoa there! Looks like the Brits are finally trying to compete. Here's a fantastic piece of business vérité by John Elcock. We would come over all nervous if he was to enter the lift when we were already in the lift.
"Which floor, John? I'll press the button for you. Fourth? No, let me. Oh no! Our fingers touched!"
Could do with a tie. Probably only has stripy ties and thought a stripy tie would've been too many stripes. Tough call. Probably right, knowing John. We'll never know what went on in Mr Elcock's bedroom that morning. We'd imagine there was at least 20 minutes of face-practising in the mirror, though. No one smoulders like that by accident.
Closer facial analysis reveals an alarmingly asymmetrical face.
He is a fat man and a beady-eyed thin man in one.